Speaker, coach and writer Denise Utter shares her thoughts on youth and family engagement during a Zoom session last month. The diocese is on a three-year journey to explore priorities identified in the Diocesan Synod listening sessions in 2022.
By Lindsay Steele
The Catholic Messenger
“Mind the Gap” signs urge British rail passengers to watch their step while navigating between platforms and train cars. Denise Utter, a Chicago-based speaker, coach and writer, sees this warning as an apt metaphor for the space between listening and doing.
She recently encouraged diocesan Catholics to keep this space in mind as they focus on reimagining youth and family engagement at the parish level. “We don’t jump to doing,” she explained. “We sift through what we hear and it helps us discern what comes next and decide how we’re going to respond.”
Utter offered these thoughts during a Zoom session last month as part of the Davenport Diocese’s three-year journey to explore priorities identified in the Diocesan Synod listening sessions in 2022. The focus of year two, which began in June, is youth and family engagement. Utter spoke at the year two kick-off summit and is leading four follow-up sessions via Zoom.
During the first Zoom session, held in August, Utter emphasized listening as a vital step toward change. She encouraged parish teams to create opportunities for parents and others to share their needs, concerns and experiences. The second Zoom, “Minding the Gap – Going from Listening to Vision-Storming,” took place last month.
Several parishes said they are conducting surveys, listening sessions and/or town hall meetings to hear parishioners’ thoughts and concerns about youth and family engagement. One participant expressed difficulty in getting people to participate in listening sessions, even after offering personal invitations. Utter suggested developing an event that is “so inviting that they can’t say no,” like offering a meal out or hosting a nice dinner. It can also help if potential participants understand why the listening sessions are relevant, so they feel as if they have skin in the game. “Otherwise, it’s something the Church is asking them to do and they aren’t sure what they could even bring to it.” Diocesan Marriage and Family Life Coordinator Marianne Agnoli suggested planning events to do at the church after Mass or during youth activities.
Once listening sessions are complete, parishes can begin the process of brainstorming solutions. Utter encourages parishes to form brainstorming groups composed of individuals with unique gifts and personalities. Productive groups include a “big ideas” person, a logistics person, a “what if” person, a cheerleader, a mediator and a communicator. “It really depends on your community and what gifts you see, but these are just some of the people you can have around the table.”
Utter encourages parishes to dream big and defer judgment by separating idea generation from the evaluation of ideas. “In doing so, you give your imagination and creativity a voice while placating your rational side in knowing that you will get to the examination of merits later.”
Parishes can stumble if they don’t handle parishioners’ concerns with care, she warned. Some parish leaders will superimpose their plans, molding what they heard as a way to justify them. Others will listen but not change anything. Even if changes are in progress, participants may feel discouraged if they are not kept in the loop.
Parishes will not be able to make everyone happy; developing concepts that are all things to all people is an impossible task, Utter believes. “You want to meet specific needs. You want to define problems that were named specifically by the people that you listened to.”
The next follow-up session, “Unleashing Creative Possibilities,” will take place Feb. 20 from 7:30-9 p.m. on Zoom. “None of us are experts in this right now because this isn’t the way we’ve done faith formation,” Utter said. “We just know what we’ve been doing is no longer creating disciples as we intend, so we need to figure out some new thing to engage the whole family.”
Recordings of previous summit events and additional resources are available at https://www.davenportdiocese.org/synodal-summit-yfe. For more information about the upcoming sessions, contact Marianne Agnoli at 563-888-4242 or agnolim@davenportdiocese.org.
