By Barb Arland-Fye
Editor
My dad, Ray Arland, graduated from college planning to be a teacher but God had other plans, which led to a career in the life insurance business. However, as I reflect back on my relationship with my dad, I realize that he has served as a teacher for his family, the people he mentored in the insurance business and others with whom he interacted. He teaches by example through his demeanor, tone of voice, thoughtful guidance and a corny sense of humor.
You win people over through diplomacy, he taught me. It is a lesson that proves to be invaluable when practiced! On more than a few occasions growing up, after I said something I regretted and hastily apologized, my dad would advise me to think before I speak. “Then you won’t have to apologize,” he said. Some days I am able to master that skill and other days, not so much.
One morning recently, while my husband Steve and I were praying the Liturgy of the Hours, this verse from Psalm 141 held my attention, “Set, O Lord, a guard over my mouth; keep watch at the door of my lips! …”
We have read that verse many times before through the years that we have been praying the Liturgy of the Hours but on this particular morning, it seemed as if that verse was calling me out! I thought about Dad’s reminder over all the years and Steve’s more recent reminder to count to 5 before letting the words spill out of my mouth.
Dad and Steve both set the example for keeping watch at the door of their lips. It seems to come naturally for them. For me, it seems to be a work in progress with a long learning curve. Why is that advice so challenging for me, I have asked myself — and God.
The Jesuits, and people who appreciate Ignatian spirituality, pray the Ignatian Examen. “St. Ignatius invites us to find God in all things,” the Jesuit website states. “That means we have to pay careful attention to how the Spirit is moving in each moment of our daily lives. We have to take a magnifying glass to the seemingly ordinary, seeking to encounter the Divine” (jesuits.org/spirituality/the-ignatian-examen).
This flexible prayer includes some prompts. I am to review my day and to consider how my thoughts, words and actions drew me closer or farther away from God. I believe God was getting my attention in a special way that morning when I prayed Psalm 141 with Steve.
Perhaps God is offering me a way to keep watch at the door of my lips — through prayer and teachers like my dad and Steve.
(Contact Editor Barb Arland-Fye at arland-fye@davenportdiocese.org)
