Marital advice from God


OK, let’s be clear here. I very much love my husband of almost 42 years. I do. Really. We have a fairly normal marriage and, yes, that includes a little bickering now and then. Bickering we were on a recent morning. I’d told him and told him how to fix our lives, but had he listened? No!

It was a Sunday, so I took my problem to church. In the quiet, I prayed the Married Person’s Prayer. The one that goes, “Dear God, change HIM! Soon!”  

I’ve prayed this many times, with no sign that the Almighty heard me. This Sunday, it was different. I did “hear” God. Not in the wind or fire or even in a whisper, but close and clear enough.

“He’s not yours, Martha. He’s mine. Leave him alone.”


There was no question in my mind that this was a direct message from God – however that works; but, being human, I did check to be sure that Johnny was still in the back of the church with the other ushers and could not have been the culprit.

I didn’t get much out of the rest of the Mass, as that message keep repeating, like a song stuck on an endless loop.

“He’s not yours, Martha. He’s mine. Leave him alone.”

That was a couple of weeks ago. So far, it’s helped me not nag so much. Only a tiny bit less, maybe, but still progress. Johnny hasn’t become quite the person whom I’ve designed in my Grand Plan for a Spouse, but he’s looking better these days.

I had Johnny read the draft of this article and asked if he’d noticed my better behavior. “Yes.” Really? “No.” That doesn’t matter. I sense a difference in me and that is a beginning.

This is hard, God. But I do thank you for being the God who listens and, sometimes, gives clear answers to prayers.

“If today you hear my voice, harden not your heart.”

I try, God, Amen.

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