By John Oven
Guest Column
When I arrived at the Davenport Diocese’s vocation ministry workshop for parishes in January, I was very excited that attention and diocesan resources were being devoted to this worthy cause.
During the workshop at St. Patrick Parish in Iowa City, guest speaker Bob McMorrow of Vocations Ministry shared annual survey results of newly ordained priests. He asked participants to consider the results and how to action them in their own parish vocations committees in order to grow vocations in the diocese. One survey question posed to the newly ordained was: “Were you encouraged to consider the priesthood by any of these people? Check all that apply.” McMorrow said that 71% of newly ordained priests reported that it was a priest who invited them to consider the priesthood.
While the conclusion McMorrow presented was that priests have the greatest influence and therefore a great responsibility to promote vocations, what resonated with me was the astonishing fact that parents and grandparents were all outperformed by parish priests, friends, and parishioners in fulfilling their duty to educate and support a young man discerning a call to the priesthood.
Parents and grandparents actually have an obligation, based on their wedding vows, to assist their children in the process of discernment. Unfortunately the survey results were: mother: 37%, father: 29%, and grandparent(s): 22%. This represents either a lack of support or, possibly, resistance from family. It’s time to change that.
It doesn’t matter whether you have kids, grandkids, or even great-grandkids, it is never too late to start developing a culture of vocations within our families. Here are five ideas for fostering vocations in the home, whether priesthood, religious life or sacramental marriage:
- Take your kids to Mass. This is not just for young parents but also for parents with grown children. Now is the time to explain again to your children, who want to learn from you, how important it is for us to attend Mass, at a minimum, on Sundays and Holy Days of Obligation. It will be your example of intentionality that will draw them in and allow them to gain an appreciation of how to live as a Catholic, even on weekdays.
- Lead by example in living out your vocation and Catholic faith. Continue to read and learn more about the faith. Frequent the sacraments of confession and the Eucharist. If you still haven’t yet, get your marriage convalidated in the Church so that you can receive the sacraments. Insist on baptism in the Catholic Church for your children and grandchildren.
- Reframe questions about the future. Do not ask “What do you want to be when you grow up?” but rather “What do you think God is asking you to do?” or “Where do you feel God is calling you to love?” A vocation is not something we choose, but rather, a God-given work that we accept.
- Take your kids to Eucharistic adoration. This has been consistently cited by seminarians and priests as a very formative time when they were able to hear their calling and respond to it from their heart. Your kids’ time in adoration will allow them to build a personal relationship with Jesus that will help them thrive in whatever vocation they are called to.
- Invite a priest, bishop, religious brother or sister over for dinner. Bring home real examples of Catholics living out their vocation so that your children can ask questions and get to know the ordinary people who said yes to a call from God. Discernment is a difficult process and it helps to meet others who have navigated the process and who are willing to share their story.
This is in no way an exhaustive list or a list of requirements; only ideas to inspire. Start by finding small ways to put God at the center of your family by involving him in each day, rather than once a week on Sunday. Your children will learn to put God first by watching you do it.
Vocation discernment and faith life start in the home. Fulfilling our vocation as parents and grandparents does not end when a child turns 18 or graduates high school. It continues to be our responsibility to nurture and support the vocations of our children and others as we look to a future where all young people in the Diocese of Davenport are able to hear and respond to their God-given mission in life.
(John Oven is a parishioner of St. Mary Magdalen Parish in Bloomfield. He is a member of his parish’s vocations committee.)
