By Jenna Ebener
A reflection
During my daily rosary, I recently pondered what seems to be a contradiction in the 5th Joyful Mystery. This final mystery is the finding of Jesus in the Temple. I was struck by how a story that starts off in fear can be a joyful mystery. The story, found in Luke 2:41-52, is about how Jesus stayed behind in the temple in Jerusalem while his parents started the trek back home. When they realized he was missing, it took them three days to find him. Imagine the fear and anxiety as they searched for their 12-year-old son! Then imagine their frustration when he seemed to not understand the turmoil he put them through. Yet, Mary “treasured all these things in her heart” (Luke 2:51).
Mary was able to see the gift that God gave her through that scary experience. Her fear of losing Jesus allowed her to feel even greater joy when they were reunited. Even more so, she was then able to see the fear as a gift and pondered the entire experience.
Love is not easy. It opens us up to intense emotions, such as fear and grief. It opens the doorway to pain. I wonder if that is why there is so much hatred in our world right now — it seems a lot easier to hate someone or something than to open yourself up to love, and, therefore, the possibility of pain. It seems simpler to numb out or to lose yourself in hatred. It is also easy to get so wrapped up in the fear and grief that can come out of love that it can be hard to see that pain as a gift, as Mary did.
In the movie “Wicked: for Good,” which chronicles events in the fictional land of Oz before the arrival of Dorothy, we are reminded of how often society has to have a scapegoat. It is so much easier to blame someone than to look inward at what is truly eating away at us. In the original “The Wizard of Oz,” we take it at face value that the Wicked Witch of the West is indeed wicked. Yet, by learning about her and her story, we see there is so much more than meets the eye. We see someone who is actively resisting evil in the world. As a result, the “great and powerful” Wizard of Oz needs to turn the people against her so he does not lose the power that now defines his identity. He knows how to activate people’s fear by spreading a false story. When she confronts him and urges him to tell the truth, he says the people will not believe him. They need someone to fear and to blame. Even though the “wicked witch” did no wrong and only worked for the well-being of others, she has to make the ultimate sacrifice of leaving.
Our world needs a scapegoat too. It seems we are increasingly being told to want things that bring only more fear or hatred, not love. Jesus was the ultimate scapegoat. He willingly went through humiliation and ridicule in order to show his deep, pure love for each and every one of us.
What are you willing to endure for love? Are you willing to sit with the fear, pain and suffering that comes with the burden of carrying your own cross? Are you able to see the gift that suffering brings? It may seem like too much to bear, but remember, God will not give you more than you can handle. “I can do all things through him who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13). You are not alone. “This is the day the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it” (Psalm 118:24).
(Jenna Ebener, a graduate of St. Ambrose University in Davenport, is a social worker at a school in Colorado for students with a combination of medical, cognitive and behavior disabilities. She relies on God every day to aid her on this wonderful, yet intense journey.)
